rants & ramblings: Daily View, 8/30

Ok, clearly Helen Mirren has a plan. I just found out that she also played Elizabeth I on TV last year. Guess the old girl finally said, "Fuck this, I want awards." Rock on, Hels.

"Wouldn't the paper disintegrate before you're finished writing down whatever it is you're writing?" SO not the point. Things that happen underwater are just cool.

Poor Adrien Grenier. So he wore a brown shirt. Worse things have been done, and brown was the new black just a second ago. C'mon.

Hmm... I think my little brother just got caught kissing John Travolta... Ah well, at least it wasn't Cruise. Jon, if you're going to make out with celeb scientologists, at least gnaw on Jason Lee, eh?

Social networking tries to get organized: HiveLive (BoingBoing just blew the invite only signup link wide open). Seriously, though, you could just use Backpack.

Paddlestar Galactica. Points for the creative use of the blue Johnny-on-the-Spot.

When I think decoupage, I think violet-scented crap. John Derian is making me reconsider (though I still get a faint whiff of the violets).

Poachers suck. Fucking senseless. Arg. Lately I'm realizing how much human-on-animal violence upsets me. I cried when they killed the circus animals in Max Tivoli. I get an instant stress headache dealing with the trapping victim photos for the anti-fur websites we work with. There have been several movies lately with throwaway animal cruelty moments that have made me shudder and look away. Sigh. Yet animal-on-animal violence doesn't make me blink. I'm also relatively unmoved when humans do awful things to each other. Hmm. So maybe I will end up one of those old ladies living alone, squinting into the glow of the computer screen, surrounded by a hundred cats, hissing that humans are worthless. ACK.

Er, why? As much as I appreciate any sentence beginning with "Auch die Beauty-Accessoires der Bubblegumqueen...", I don't get the appeal of the shirt. And this one is just wrong.

Despite an unfortunate appreciation for their early music during my 50s cheesecake phase in the 80s (how many times can one 12 year old listen to "Surfer Girl" before the parentals need to take that shizz away?), I have never been able to really appreciate the Beach Boys. They were even my very first "rock" concert (hahahahaha can I get a harmony chorus of shame?). Yet still, I just can't...

Anonymous said...: is helen mirren sensing that there is Judy Dench bilge for the suckdown?
Is she just drinking the dame's bathwater?
tell me.; 3:24 AM
kate said...: hm, good point. maybe she is just drinking dench.

meanwhile, judy's like "i have tread such ground before, you slut. years of getting your kit off and you think a few queens bring you back to class? i've become so awesome that fifteen minutes in a movie can get me an oscar. AND i've been able to creatively experiment with trash like bond and chronicles of riddick. i know, i know, you're a dame as well, but i've been there and done that, woman. queens in your 60s? i wrote that bloody book and don't you forget it."

to which helen mirren responds by simply removing her top to flash breasts that are still inspiring at 61. "i'm also a dame and the men of britain have coveted me for decades. so fuck off, you ancient cow. i'm pure sex AND a good actress, which is more than you can say, you unfuckable old handbag."

and then they proceed to wait patiently until someone can shoot oscar- and bafta-worthy footage of them ripping each other to shreds. this film goes on to win every major award and the clip of judy clawing off helen's famous cleavage reaches new heights of legend on the internet as the boomers age and get tech-savvy.

ok, i clearly need caffeine.; 10:41 AM

rants & ramblings